| Only one person is called OMG |
A Priest is called as a Father A Bishop your Grace A Cardinal, your Eminence… Even a Pope is called as, His Highness. But only a 36 – 24 – 36 in a Bikini is called as “OH MY GOD” ================================================== You can also find us on: http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/funny-hilarious-jokes/id492166165?ls=1&mt=8 Twitter at @jokesguy Facebook at: Happy Yours Funny Guy http: www.its-hilarious.com email: funny.guy@its-hilarious.com ================================================== |
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Only one person is called OMG : Its-hilarious
Only one person is called OMG : Its-hilarious
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Its-hilarious
Its-hilarious
| Rejection of a rejection letter |
Herbert Millington Chair - Search Committee, Whitson University, College Hill, MA Dear Professor Millington, Thank you for your letter of March 16. After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me an assistant professor position in your department. This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals. Despite Whitson's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professor in your department this August. I look forward to seeing you then. All the best for rejecting the future applicants. Sincerely, Chris L. Jensen ================================================== You can also find us on: http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/funny-hilarious-jokes/id492166165?ls=1&mt=8 Twitter at @jokesguy Facebook at: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Its-hilariouscom/193947747290918 Yours Funny Guy http: www.its-hilarious.com email: funny.guy@its-hilarious.com ================================================== |
Its-hilarious
Its-hilarious
| Facts of Life! |
Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people. To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated but not be able to say it. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. The older you get, the better you realize you were. I doubt, therefore I might be. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. Women like silent, they think they're listening. Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. |
Age brings wisdom : Its-hilarious
Age brings wisdom : Its-hilarious
| Age brings wisdom |
An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, I don't think you understand, I want something very special. At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000, the jeweler said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, We'll take it. The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated, by check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon, he said. Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. There's no money in that account. I know, said the old man, but can you imagine the weekend I had? ================================================== You can also find us on: 1. iPhone/iPod/iPad at http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/funny-hilarious-jokes/id492166165?ls=1&mt=8 2. Twitter at @jokesguy http://www.facebook.com/pages/Its-hilariouscom/193947747290918 Happy Yours Funny Guy http: www.its-hilarious.com email: funny.guy@its-hilarious.com |
buy organic vegetables for your wife : Its-hilarious
buy organic vegetables for your wife : Its-hilarious
| Organic Vegetables |
During a Coffee Break, two men were talking, "My wife asked me to buy ORGANIC vegetables from the market garden." said the first man. "So were you able to find some?" the second man, asked. "Well when I got to the market, I asked the gardener, 'These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?'" The gardener said, "No, you'll have to do that yourself." ================================================== You can also find us on: http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/funny-hilarious-jokes/id492166165?ls=1&mt=8 2. Twitter at @jokesguy Funny Guy http: www.its-hilarious.com email: funny.guy@its-hilarious.com |
| Returned Unopened |
In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer, so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone: "Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin." Not long after, the old maid died peacefully, and the undertaker told these men what the lady had said. The men went to carve it in, but as the lazy no-goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long. They simply wrote: "Returned un-opened."
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Stop irritating me : Its-hilarious
Stop irritating me : Its-hilarious
| How to make breakfast |
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful. CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my goodness! "You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my! "WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! "Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? "Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!" The wife stared at him. "What's wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?" The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving." ================================================== You can also find us on: http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/funny-hilarious-jokes/id492166165?ls=1&mt=8 2. Twitter at @jokesguy Funny Guy email: funny.guy@its-hilarious.com |
Marriage quotes : Its-hilarious
Marriage quotes : Its-hilarious
| Quotes on marriage |
Every man should get married some time after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!! - Anonymous Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others. - Oscar Wilde Don't marry for money, you can borrow it cheaper. - Scottish Proverb I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. - Sam Kinison Men have a better time than women, for one thing, they marry later for another thing, they die earlier. - H. L. Mencken When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why. Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home always. - Anonymous I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She said,"Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?" - Anonymous We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours. That was only for the estimate. - Anonymous She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off. - Anonymous She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in." - Anonymous Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to get to married. He says "the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs..." - Anonymous If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in first? The Dog of course... at least he'll shut up after u let him in! - Anonymous |
Wishing well : Its-hilarious
Wishing well : Its-hilarious
| Wishing Well |
| A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a coin . The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled "It really works ! " ================================================== You can also find us on: 1. iPhone/iPod/iPad at http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/funny-hilarious-jokes/id492166165?ls=1&mt=8 2. Twitter at @jokesguy 3. Facebook at: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Its-hilariouscom/193246017362355 Happy Yours Funny Guy http: www.its-hilarious.com email: funny.guy@its-hilarious.com |
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